Germany has been hitting the news recently following the widely publicised Dioxin scare. This week, the focus of attention has moved from poultry eggs to pigs, and many will be slaughtered and burned like heathen kings of old to try and prevent the further spreading of the toxin. A farm in Verden, Niedersachsen used contaminated feed and fears are this will be passed on into the food supply.
Are all German pigs hiding underwater? Image via Photobucket
German media claims infected meat has even been sold to customers. 144 pigs slaughtered between 2nd and 20th of December have most likely already ended up on consumer shelves.
Economic powerhouse and diplomatic pioneer South Korea has already banned German pork, while the agricultural minister spoke of the “immense” blow to consumer trust in German pork products. This leads swiftly onto the issue of Germany’s intense over-reliance on the meat. If you want to buy mince meat, eat a steak or grill a sausage, it is almost certain to be pork. Germany loves pork. In any supermarket, if you find a spare moment to catch your breath and look around before being herded through the checkouts at 200kmh, you will be amazed at the amount of pork compared to other meats such as lamb or beef which are almost impossible to find, and even chicken is far less common.
"So right now I am touching an invisible pig?" Obama learns the truth about where the fuck all the pigs are. Image via Photobucket.
The real question, though, is where the hell all the pigs are. Verden, evidently, although the amount of pork produced and consumed in this vast nation must come from somewhere much larger. Never mind the fact there surely isn’t a man alive who could tell you where Verden even is. Having lived in and travelled the length and breadth of the country (including a great many agricultural areas, and Thüringen – home of the country’s most famous pork sausage), I am genuinely yet to see a single pig farm or even a solitary pig. Comparing notes with friends and colleagues from all corners of the country, nobody has ever seen a pig farm. The implication may well be that all pigs are kept away in battery farms, or that they are in areas so desolate and uninteresting that no one would ever bother to go there, like Norwich.
A cautious prediction would be that the scare will pass over quickly and all be forgotten. After all, we should all be dead from SARS, bird flu and BSE by now if you believe everything in the media. Germany’s love of pork pales only to the national debt to David Hasselhoff, who heroically rocked down the Berlin Wall. Soon enough, little Hans will be tucking into his pork flakes for breakfast again.
(On a mildly serious note: Check with your doctor if you are concerned about having possibly come into contact with contaminated meat. Even if you aren’t affected, any German doctor will write you off sick for a week anyway. Result.)
from the outside looking in 